Spending time every day with the mother can make the child possessive, you know. If left unchecked, your activities will be more limited and your little one will cry easily when you are not by his side. So, how to solve it?
Since the little one is still in the womb until the first few years of life, it is undeniable that the mother plays a big role in her upbringing. Almost all of Mother's time and attention is devoted to him.
For this reason, it is only natural for Mother to be the person who is idolized and loved by the Little One, to the point that he does not want to be separated from Mother's side and continues to cling to him all day long. In boys, possessiveness towards their mother can also be a sign of an Oedipus complex.
A Line of Ways to Overcome a Possessive Child
Actually, it's normal for a child to be possessive and want to spend time with his mother. how come. This condition can occur because he feels very comfortable and safe beside his mother, so he doesn't want to be left alone even for a minute.
However, this is certainly not good if left alone. Constantly following the child's wishes is also not allowed, you know, Bun. In addition, if his possessive nature continues to carry over until he grows up, later the Little One will find it difficult to be independent without Mother's help.
nowHere are some tips for dealing with possessive children:
1. Give understanding
One way to deal with a possessive child is to often give him understanding. When you have to do something that distracts you from it, such as cooking or bathing, it's very important that you explain what you have to do.
Even though they are young, children can understand what their mother is saying, how come. So, try to tell your little one repeatedly in simple sentences, so he can understand.
2. Divert his attention
Having a possessive child often makes a mother have to hold back urination. A possessive child will fuss or cry even if the mother only goes to the bathroom for a while. In fact, not a few children are forced to follow their mother to the bathroom, you know.
nowSo, so that the little one's focus is no longer on the mother, the mother can distract her, for example by giving her a toy or reading book. After that, you can hurry to do what you need to do.
3. Give the child a small task
Possessive nature can arise because the child feels that he can do nothing without his mother. nowYou can change this mindset by getting your little one to be independent. Just give him a small task, like tidying up his toys or simply setting things on the table before dinner.
After he does the work you asked, don't forget to praise him for what he has done. That way, your little one will realize that he can do things on his own without the need to always be with you.
4. Don't forget to say goodbye
A possessive child will not let his mother go somewhere without taking him. So that your little one understands that you have to leave his side and go somewhere, it is important to say goodbye to him before you leave the house and tell him when you will be back.
If your little one cries, try to calm him down first. In order not to make you late, say goodbye a few hours before leaving, or even the day before.
Give understanding that Mother has to leave the house, for example, go shopping and she can't come along, especially in the middle of a pandemic like now. You can also ask your father, nanny, or other family members for help to look after your little one when you are away.
Dealing with a possessive child towards his mother is not easy and requires a lot of patience. However, that doesn't mean this trait can't be changed.
If you have done the tips above but your baby still doesn't want to be separated from you or even shows an excessive reaction when left, for example breaking things or hurting himself, it's a good idea for you to consult a doctor or psychologist to get the right direction.