Disciplining children is important, but there still needs to be rules and boundaries. Jfishthe attitude of parents is too harsh on the child in the application of discipline, this can have a negative influence on his personality in the future.
Some of the impacts that occur when parents are too harsh on children are that children tend to be individuals who are too worried, not confident, behave aggressively or are too shy around other people, have difficulty socializing, and have difficulty controlling themselves.
Not only that, if you apply discipline that is too strict, the risk can actually corner your child to be forced to lie to avoid punishment.
Signs That Parents Educate Children Too Hard
Parenting patterns of parents in educating children vary widely. Here are signs that parents are educating their children too hard that you need to know:
1. Just mepraise the best results child
Praising your child is important, but if you only like to praise your child's best results, your little one may assume that you only love him when he is successful. From now on, try to keep praising your child even if he fails or doesn't achieve the expected results, as long as he tries well.
2. Just giving orders
Parents who are too harsh on their children tend to give orders that must be obeyed right away. If you are aware of this attitude, try to give your little one freedom as long as he is responsible.
You can change the command sentence into a question sentence with a polite tone, for example, "Do you want to clean the room first or put the dirty clothes in the bucket?"
3. Tno tolerance
Parents who are too hard on their children tend not to see the cause or reason when their children don't do what they want. For example, you want your little one to keep his clothes clean, but suddenly you see the clothes he is wearing are dirty.
Don't get angry right away, Bun, first ask the reason and let your little one explain. Who knows his clothes are dirty because he fell.
4. Soften nagging and punishing
Nagging or punishing a child is actually okay as long as it is within reasonable limits. On the other hand, nagging too often can actually make children afraid to do something. The impact in the future is that children find it difficult to be independent and less creative.
Change Parenting from Authoritarian to Authoritative
Mother and Father need to be more careful in educating the Little One. Parenting that is too harsh or authoritarian like the examples above can have a bad impact on the child's personality.
Instead of sticking with an authoritarian parenting pattern that tends to make children stressed, it's better to change to an authoritative or democratic parenting style.
According to research, children of authoritarian parents tend to be more prone to depression and low self-esteem, while children raised in authoritative parenting tend to be more self-controlled and confident.
Here are the characteristics of authoritative parenting that you need to know:
- Encourage children to express opinions and discuss options
- Adjusting expectations according to the child's condition and situation
- Accept and listen to children's arguments, even though they don't always agree
- Giving punishment with explanation
- Believing that although children need to follow orders, children must also be respected and have their own needs
- Realizing that even though parents have power and will over their children, they must also be wise
From the explanation above, Mother now understands that the attitude of parents being too harsh on their children is not a good way of educating. This is because practicing discipline in children requires patience. If you feel the need, you can ask a psychologist for help to get tips on educating children according to their character.